The "Decision" to Heal

Good day all. Welcome to Day 3 of victorious singleness.

Today's post comes pretty easy, because it's based on my own experiences. I must say that I was preparing to post this since yesterday, especially after reading a Facebook status of a very dear friend. She was talking about preachers who criticize other ministries from the pulpit. My comment to this is that there are many wounded people "ministering" through their wounds. And this is not limited to preachers, just as ministry is not limited to pulpiteers.

We minister (share the love of God and the gospel of Jesus Christ) as believers with everyone in our lives and if we are wounded, our efforts are not nearly as effective and can, in fact, be very harmful. No matter how hard we try to cover and camouflage our woundedness, it comes out in one form or another. We must make the "decision" that we will seek and achieve healing for the sake of those we say we love and those we will attempt to love in the future.

Wounded parents, wound their children -- very often unintentionally. Wounded friends, hurt other friends -- but we have to KNOW that we are wounded and therein lies the biggest dilemma. When we do not know we are wounded, we assume that everything negative that occurs in our lives and those we've touched, is someone else's fault or someone else's problem. We become victims and teach victimization to those in our care. This is more dangerous than a bullet through the heart, because it has a domino effect that can last a lifetime and cause us only to have superficial, surface relationships. Only those who are as wounded as we are or so desperate to have a connection that they just accept our wounds and join in, are able to stay in our circle. We only attract wounded people and chase away the healthy.

Having experienced abuse in my childhood, I worked feverishly to not be "that" person. Always trying to please, do the "right" thing. And when it came down, it almost destroyed me -- but God. Having to stop everything, gave me a chance to really see how wounded I was and for the sake of all those God had placed and would place in my life, as well as for the sake of the fulfillment of God's purpose for MY life, I had to get healed. The only way that I could be healed was to turn to the Healer, Jehovah Rapha. Not being "super-spiritual" -- by turning to the Healer, I mean that I had to acknowledge that I had unmet needs, unresolved issues, and unhealed hurts (thanks Carolyn Driver!), then ALLOW God to show me the path to healing. God began to bring people in my life, like my professors at Beulah Heights University, that taught me how to be healthy and subsequently a better mom, friend, minister... Why??? Because once we are healed, we become the truth that we seek and we begin to serve healthy "food" that changes lives. Not just rhetoric and repeating stuff that we've heard, but genuine truth, our truth.

When we are living life from a genuine place, it becomes less difficult to forgive and restore those who have hurt us. We don't even care WHY they hurt us, we just know that they need to see what forgiveness looks like. That ACTION, however it is played out in your life, will be seed sown in fertile ground. Being healthy also helps you recognize those who are healed and leads you to make more conscious decisions about who should be in your life, for how long and to what degree. Being healed opens our spirits to received direction, since we are no longer clogged with the pain of our past. Being healed helps us to share pure, untainted love -- Godly love that does not REQUIRE that those around us perform in order to receive it.

Make a commitment to search your heart and memory for "the pain". Be silent and ask God, not only to show you the pain, but also to guide you to forgiveness and healing. If we are constantly knee-deep in criticism of ourselves and others and it comes out in our walk and daily talk -- our wounds are showing. Get healed -- DECIDE to be healed -- PURE LOVE is waiting.